In an effort to get better attendance at the Perth Test this week, promoters have negotiated a blockbuster deal to see Little Davey Warner go toe to toe with Mitchell Johnson in a cage before the start of the first day.
No doubt the two men will have plenty to “discuss” in the cage after Johnson launched a legendary attack on the struggling opening batter this month. The promoter told The Times,
“It would be foolish not to capitalise on the simmering tension between those two. Who knows, maybe some bare-knuckle love will fire up Warner to score some runs too”
Sources from within the Warner camp say that while David is furious at the attack he’s also quite concerned about Mitchell’s superior reach.
Sources from within the Johnson camp say the former Aussie fast bowler is absolutely itching for a piece of that evil little batting gremlin.
Alas, experts are warning Johnson not to be too cocky. With Warner being “precisely” the kind of guy to throw sand in his eye or some other cheating dogshit play. Adding,
“Yeah, Johnson has the size and venom but Davey will almost certainly try to hack the balls. If he gets you on the ground then expect hair pulling too. It’s just not cricket but that’s who he is”
We understand that Justin Langer volunteered to adjudicate the fight. No doubt to be up close and personal when Davey cops one to the chops.
The measures have been introduced due to the dismal turnout last summer when the West Indies toured.
No doubt that was largely due to the fact the test started during the middle of the week against an uncompetitive team. Nevertheless, the jeers and laughter from the Eastern States still haunt WA to this day.
RELATED: Mitchell Johnson reveals David Warner is the sort of bloke that enforces LBW in backyard cricket
Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?
