Matilda’s fan Jessica has suddenly speaking with ceceo which is colloquially known as the Spanish lisp. The change happened immediately after England scored a 3rd goal in Wednesday’s match.
The vernacular switch is peculiar, especially as Jessica has not dropped meaty “th” noises in her words for the past 24 years. Her mate Lizzie told The Times,
“I got a call from Jess and she said Hola Lithhhhie. I thought she was just being goofy but the hits kept coming. About half way through I asked her if she was OK and she said she was living la Vida loca and then chanted A por ellos, oo ee A por ellos, oo ee A por ellos, oo ee A por ellos, ee oo ee”
We spoke to Jethhhica after she’d returned with enough chorithho to feed the amigothhs (I’m her words). She told The Times,
“I don’t even know if I’m using it correctly all I know is that i live and breath Espana! I think it has something to do with my 2018 trip to ibithhhha and the fact a Brit boy gave me the clap. God I hate the English. Que Viva España!!”
Jettthica certainly isn’t backing down from her newly found Spaniardry and has even invested in a full soccer kit from Nike. She claims she mist looks good in fiery red.
Jethhhica’s main squeeze has even started picking his undies out of his arse like prominent Spaniard Raffa. He also feels strongly about a Spanish destruction of the Lionesses.
