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Friday, April 03, 2026
The Bell Tower Times
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

    Police called to Perth Maccas after man explains his 5 Fillet-O-Fish order has nothing to do with Good Friday

    A Perth McDonalds has been left scrambling for answers today after a man boldly entered the store and ordered 5 Fillet-O-Fish burgers without even a…

    Belle April 3, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

    Local Seagulls Thank Catholic Guilt As They Prepare For Their Biggest Day Of The Year

    Good Friday is the official seagull grand final with over 500% more fish & chip munching families to terrorise in their endless pursuit for a…

    Belle April 3, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

    Local mum reconsiders catholic guilt as cost-of-living means ol mate Cap’n Birds Eye is coming for lunch

    Local mum Patricia has seriously questioned her annual display of faith after realising that the weekend budget doesn’t allow for the frills of bougie fish…

    Belle April 3, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Politics

    WA to Invoke Emergency Powers to Divert Froffs to Those Who Forgot to Stock Up Before Good Friday

    Roger Cook has called a special press conference to announce WA will be invoking emergency powers to stop the indignity of the Good Friday booze…

    Belle April 2, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    NASA Reveals Artemis Program Aims to Establish New Perth Suburb on Moon

    Plans for the latest Perth suburb in the ever-expansive sprawl have moved one step closer after the successful launch of the Orion as part of…

    Belle April 2, 2026
    View More

BREAKING NEWS Local

Eastern State Relative Under Heavy Fire After Bringing Up Daylight Saving During WA Visit

Belle December 22, 2022

Smellburn man, Anthony, didn’t understand what he was unleashing after bringing up Daylight Saving when he caught up with his wife’s Western Australian family this…

View More Eastern State Relative Under Heavy Fire After Bringing Up Daylight Saving During WA Visit
BREAKING NEWS

Man Lapping Up Credit For “Working” Over Xmas Settling In To Do Absolutely Nothing For 2 Weeks

Belle December 22, 2022

Senior management at a mid-sized business has commended a young worker’s gumption after he selflessly agreed to not take any additional time off over Xmas…

View More Man Lapping Up Credit For “Working” Over Xmas Settling In To Do Absolutely Nothing For 2 Weeks
BREAKING NEWS Technology & Finance

Family Warned Not To Bring Up Idiot Cousin’s Crypto Portfolio Ahead Of Xmas

Belle December 20, 2022

A Perth matriarch has fought back the tears of shame to warn her extended family to not bring up their dropkick cousin’s crypto portfolio this…

View More Family Warned Not To Bring Up Idiot Cousin’s Crypto Portfolio Ahead Of Xmas
Featured Lifestyle

Sub-Letter’s Ad Specifies “FIFO” As “Your Mere Presence Would fkn Sicken Me” Seemed Too Rude

Belle December 20, 2022

A sub-letter looking to fill a spare room in her house has restricted the applicants to FIFO workers because deep down, the idea of someone…

View More Sub-Letter’s Ad Specifies “FIFO” As “Your Mere Presence Would fkn Sicken Me” Seemed Too Rude
Local

South Freo Man Caught With 300 Bags Of Costco Spinach At WA Border

Belle December 18, 2022

News of a “weed” in bags of NSW spinach causing “hallucinations” has rocked the east coast of Australia. As reports flow in of people experiencing…

View More South Freo Man Caught With 300 Bags Of Costco Spinach At WA Border
Local

The Louvre Scraps Mandurah Exhibit As City Loses Title Of World’s Cultural Epicentre

Belle December 17, 2022

WA has awoken to the shocking news that one of Dambo’s Giants in Coodanup was torched overnight. Not only is it a blow to society,…

View More The Louvre Scraps Mandurah Exhibit As City Loses Title Of World’s Cultural Epicentre

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TRENDING NEWS

  • Police called to Perth Maccas after man explains his 5 Fillet-O-Fish order has nothing to do with Good Friday
  • Local Seagulls Thank Catholic Guilt As They Prepare For Their Biggest Day Of The Year
  • Local mum reconsiders catholic guilt as cost-of-living means ol mate Cap’n Birds Eye is coming for lunch
  • WA to Invoke Emergency Powers to Divert Froffs to Those Who Forgot to Stock Up Before Good Friday
  • NASA Reveals Artemis Program Aims to Establish New Perth Suburb on Moon
  • Albanese Expected to Remind Nation West Coast Are Back in Tonight’s Address

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