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Wednesday, November 05, 2025
The Bell Tower Times
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Pilbara Man Establishes Dominance by Refusing to Shoo Flies from Face In Front of Perth Coworkers

    Being born in the Pilbara, Rory swallowed 3 whole flies before he’d even left his mother’s womb as an infant. Some say the additional protein…

    Belle November 5, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Tradie notoriously careless with his screws & nails admits he’s on the payroll of big tyre

    A local Perth tradesman who is thought to be responsible for over 1000 ruined tyres per month has finally admitted his patented carelessness with nails…

    Belle November 5, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Entertainment

    Ageing millennial never feels older than when looking at a festival line up

    A festival poster stuck to a fence has once again ruined an ageing millennials day as he did his best to recognise more than 1…

    Belle November 5, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times Business Entertainment

    Central accommodation, a feed and already dressed for his date with the Magistrate, Ascot race day Bogan winning

    A Perth bogan who found himself over refreshed and dangerously gee’d up has been counting his blessings while sitting in his piss soaked trousers at…

    Belle November 4, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Entertainment

    Piss-test fail warning given to anyone within a kilometre radius of the Metallica pit 

    Authorities have put out an alert that it is highly likely you may fail a piss-test tomorrow if you were within a kilometre of the…

    Belle November 2, 2025
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BREAKING NEWS Featured

WA’s First “Ride-on Mowerplex” Planned for Mundaring

Belle August 5, 2022

Mundaring ride-on speed demons are over the moon after the WA Government announced plans to invest in Australia’s first “Ride-On Mowerplex” modelled on Kwinana’s iconic…

View More WA’s First “Ride-on Mowerplex” Planned for Mundaring
True-ish Crime

Maccas, Navionics & dad’s birthday – the rise and fall of a notorious fishing spot thief

Belle August 5, 2022

One of Perth’s most notorious spot-pinchers has struck again after laying low for over 5 months. Mostly on account of no one wanting to take…

View More Maccas, Navionics & dad’s birthday – the rise and fall of a notorious fishing spot thief
BREAKING NEWS Featured

BREAKING: Swan Draught Rescued From Interstate Brewery

Belle August 4, 2022

The brewing of Swanny D kegs is finally returning to WA after 9 long years of being produced in enemy territory – West End Brewery…

View More BREAKING: Swan Draught Rescued From Interstate Brewery
BREAKING NEWS Featured

REPORT: Some Seedy Looking Faces On The Prospector Returning From Diggers Today

Belle August 4, 2022

The Kalgoorlie Prospector has enjoyed some very seedy-looking faces today as delegates return from their 3-day benders at the Diggers & Dealers Mining Forum today. …

View More REPORT: Some Seedy Looking Faces On The Prospector Returning From Diggers Today
BREAKING NEWS Featured

“Essence of Mundy” – Freo star’s DNA to be used in L’Oréal’s new anti-ageing serum

Belle August 4, 2022

L’Oréal has announced it will splice human DNA with moisturiser in an attempt to unlock the awesome anti-ageing qualities of retiring Freo midfielder David Mundy. …

View More “Essence of Mundy” – Freo star’s DNA to be used in L’Oréal’s new anti-ageing serum
BREAKING NEWS Featured

Perth Airport Promises To Pay Synergy Bill Promptly Next Time

Belle August 3, 2022

Perth Airport responded to criticism over power outages last night which led to the cancellation of flights by vowing to get on top of the…

View More Perth Airport Promises To Pay Synergy Bill Promptly Next Time

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TRENDING NEWS

  • Pilbara Man Establishes Dominance by Refusing to Shoo Flies from Face In Front of Perth Coworkers
  • Tradie notoriously careless with his screws & nails admits he’s on the payroll of big tyre
  • Ageing millennial never feels older than when looking at a festival line up
  • Central accommodation, a feed and already dressed for his date with the Magistrate, Ascot race day Bogan winning
  • Piss-test fail warning given to anyone within a kilometre radius of the Metallica pit 
  • Royal Family tells loyal subjects that the most horrific punishment they could think of for Andrew was making him one of you

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  • Perth Driver Accused Of Being A Witch After Failing To Slam Brakes Upon Entering Tunnel
  • Leering Tradie Alleges He Was Catfished After Driver Of P-Plated Suzuki Swift Turned Out To Be Middle Aged Man
  • Crack team of Pilbara miners sent to UK to assure them their heatwave was nothing 
  • Moving down train carriage far too similar to merging for Perth to feel comfortable attempting
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