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The Bell Tower Times

The Bell Tower Times

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Wednesday, November 05, 2025
The Bell Tower Times
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Pilbara Man Establishes Dominance by Refusing to Shoo Flies from Face In Front of Perth Coworkers

    Being born in the Pilbara, Rory swallowed 3 whole flies before he’d even left his mother’s womb as an infant. Some say the additional protein…

    Belle November 5, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Tradie notoriously careless with his screws & nails admits he’s on the payroll of big tyre

    A local Perth tradesman who is thought to be responsible for over 1000 ruined tyres per month has finally admitted his patented carelessness with nails…

    Belle November 5, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Entertainment

    Ageing millennial never feels older than when looking at a festival line up

    A festival poster stuck to a fence has once again ruined an ageing millennials day as he did his best to recognise more than 1…

    Belle November 5, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times Business Entertainment

    Central accommodation, a feed and already dressed for his date with the Magistrate, Ascot race day Bogan winning

    A Perth bogan who found himself over refreshed and dangerously gee’d up has been counting his blessings while sitting in his piss soaked trousers at…

    Belle November 4, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Entertainment

    Piss-test fail warning given to anyone within a kilometre radius of the Metallica pit 

    Authorities have put out an alert that it is highly likely you may fail a piss-test tomorrow if you were within a kilometre of the…

    Belle November 2, 2025
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Perth & WA Locations Bell Tower Times

Mr Cottesloe

Belle August 25, 2020 Golden Triangle

Jimmy is the personification of a popped collar on a pink Ralph Lauren polo shirt. He believes that other Golden Triangle burbs are “acceptable” and…

View More Mr Cottesloe
Work & Study

Mr LinkedIn

Belle August 22, 2020 CEOprofessional

Vince is a CEO, but according to LinkedIn he is a “Leader, Opportunity Creator, Human”. He spends up to 20 hours a week on this…

View More Mr LinkedIn
Sports, Auto & Hobbies

The Talkback Radio Boomer

Belle August 21, 2020

Like any good gastroenteritis breakout, Tony is a master of giving everyone the shits. To achieve this public disservice, he embraces the medium of talkback…

View More The Talkback Radio Boomer
Work & Study

The Perth Recruiter

Belle August 19, 2020 employmentoffice

Craig is the Amazonian dick fish of the corporate world and is always hunting for the pissy trail of desperation to latch onto and suck…

View More The Perth Recruiter
Perth & WA Locations

Ms Claremont Quarter

Belle August 13, 2020 MILFShopping

Today, Jodi has opted for the classic “cool weather cougar” look: head to toe in Lululemon, a Moncler puffer vest and a handbag that’s worth…

View More Ms Claremont Quarter
Perth & WA Locations

Ms Gosnells

Belle August 13, 2020 Crime

Kailee can’t believe Koby broke up with her. She sits around in Juicy hot pants and soaks up pity like a skank-sponge in an ashtray…

View More Ms Gosnells

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TRENDING NEWS

  • Pilbara Man Establishes Dominance by Refusing to Shoo Flies from Face In Front of Perth Coworkers
  • Tradie notoriously careless with his screws & nails admits he’s on the payroll of big tyre
  • Ageing millennial never feels older than when looking at a festival line up
  • Central accommodation, a feed and already dressed for his date with the Magistrate, Ascot race day Bogan winning
  • Piss-test fail warning given to anyone within a kilometre radius of the Metallica pit 
  • Royal Family tells loyal subjects that the most horrific punishment they could think of for Andrew was making him one of you

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  • Perth Driver Accused Of Being A Witch After Failing To Slam Brakes Upon Entering Tunnel
  • Leering Tradie Alleges He Was Catfished After Driver Of P-Plated Suzuki Swift Turned Out To Be Middle Aged Man
  • Crack team of Pilbara miners sent to UK to assure them their heatwave was nothing 
  • Moving down train carriage far too similar to merging for Perth to feel comfortable attempting
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