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Wednesday, September 23, 2026
The Bell Tower Times
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Sports

    MCG warns of lengthy delays as Freo fans face bag checks for one-tonne bronze bells amid Wharfie Time ban

    The MCG has warned Fremantle Docker fans to get to the game at least 5 hours early on Saturday due to an extensive bag check…

    Belle September 23, 2026
    View More
  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Technology & Finance

    WA To Deploy AI Cameras In public Schools To Help Enforce Smart Glasses Ban Amid Zero-Tolerance Approach To Intrusive Filming

    The WA Government has made a hardline stance against perve-glasses been present at our public schools. From the start of the fourth term this year,…

    Belle September 23, 2026
    View More
  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Sports

    Freo hospo workers authorised to use Wharfie Time to get through Saturday’s grand final party

    For the first time ever, Wharfie time will be used outside of its usual Perth Stadium big screen to help the hundreds of Freo hospo…

    Belle September 22, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Sports

    Sam Mitchell goes home a winner with massive haul of 10c bottles & cans thanks to Hawks fans

    Sammy Mitchell may have lost the chance for Grand Final glory this year but he has done pretty damn well thanks to the classless behaviour…

    Belle September 20, 2026
    View More
  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Sports

    VFL Proudly Announces the 2026 Grand Final will be between the Fitzroy Lions and Fremantle Dockers

    The AFL VFL has announced that following the victory by the Brisbane Lions against Hawthorn the 2026 Grand Final will be between Fitzroy and Freo.…

    Belle September 20, 2026
    View More

BREAKING NEWS Featured

“Trees are a hoax” – Clive to Launch HC Challenge to Force WA to Continue Logging Native Forests

Belle September 9, 2021

Sources from within the Palmer camp say the rotund litigation pest was livid that WA dared to create policy without first checking with him.  In…

View More “Trees are a hoax” – Clive to Launch HC Challenge to Force WA to Continue Logging Native Forests
BREAKING NEWS Featured

AFL Backtrack on Cancelling Grand Final Parade After Seeing NORTHBRIDGE Sign

Belle September 7, 2021

Perth was shocked to hear that the AFL had ruled against staging a Grand Final parade in Perth due to terminal butthurt-itis, “terrorism” concerns, and…

View More AFL Backtrack on Cancelling Grand Final Parade After Seeing NORTHBRIDGE Sign
scarborough beach perth
BREAKING NEWS Featured

30 y/o Scarborough turbo shocked after realising beach body isn’t quite there yet

Belle September 7, 2021

Despite 6 months of neglect, local man Kyle inexplicably reckoned his rig was ready for the big stage at Scarborough today. How wrong he was. …

View More 30 y/o Scarborough turbo shocked after realising beach body isn’t quite there yet
From the Zoo Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS

IN FOCUS: Cum-trees (aka Ornamental Pears)

Belle September 6, 2021

If you’ve ever been walking down the street and suddenly get hit in the nostrils by a strong stank of baby-batter you could be forgiven…

View More IN FOCUS: Cum-trees (aka Ornamental Pears)
BREAKING NEWS Featured

REPORT: Dôme Café Really Likes the Look of that Waterside Location in Your Suburb

Belle September 4, 2021

Yesterday, we received a report that a Dôme Café location scout was seen licking his lips, rubbing his hands together, and announcing that he wanted…

View More REPORT: Dôme Café Really Likes the Look of that Waterside Location in Your Suburb
BREAKING NEWS Featured

Beer Taps to be Attached to Urinals to Honour CUB Contract at Perth Grand Final

Belle September 2, 2021

Gage Roads won’t be supplying the 2021 Grand Final with beer after being shafted by the cruel strap-on of competing contractual relationships.  Although it’s arguable…

View More Beer Taps to be Attached to Urinals to Honour CUB Contract at Perth Grand Final

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TRENDING NEWS

  • MCG warns of lengthy delays as Freo fans face bag checks for one-tonne bronze bells amid Wharfie Time ban
  • WA To Deploy AI Cameras In public Schools To Help Enforce Smart Glasses Ban Amid Zero-Tolerance Approach To Intrusive Filming
  • Freo hospo workers authorised to use Wharfie Time to get through Saturday’s grand final party
  • Sam Mitchell goes home a winner with massive haul of 10c bottles & cans thanks to Hawks fans
  • VFL Proudly Announces the 2026 Grand Final will be between the Fitzroy Lions and Fremantle Dockers
  • AFL Congratulates The Real Winners Of Last Night’s prelim final: Aussie Airlines

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