While Qantas has proven they are a sub-par transporter of people, they continue to excel in sending baggage to exotic and unknown corners of the globe. They say there is no company in the world offering the same spirit of adventure for baggage.
So it only makes sense that Qantas is now offering passengers the chance to jump through the conveyor belt and see where they end up. After all, actually getting on their flight seems to be a great way to end up back in the city you were trying to leave. A spokesperson told The Times,
“Look, post-COVID air travel was all about getting from point A to point B. That’s so 2019 and we really feel we’ve left that era behind. Now you have two options. Either go on an expensive U-ey or end up with your bags in the Guatemalan jungle without any recourse. Choice is yours”
We spoke to Ron who recently took his family on a baggage wildcard ride and said he couldn’t have been happier. Adding,
“From the absolute beating we got on the other side of the conveyor belt to the 4 continents we traversed, it was a non-stop thrill ride. We’ve seen more of the world than we ever could afford and it turns out our original flight lasted 45 minutes before returning because Qantas forget to fill her up with fuel or something”
Alan Joyce has been praised for his initiative with executives offering him another storey on his home. A course close to Joyce told The Times,
“Bonuses are important to Joycey because he lives in constant fear of actually having to fly on his own airline one day. He needs to keep that private jet level of wealth or he’ll sadly have to reap what he sowed”
Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?