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Balcatta man storms down to local bank to demand answers about currency changes following the Queen’s passing

There is one aspect of the Queen’s passing that has Balcatta man Frank hot under the collar – the impact it could have on the $5 and coin division of his backyard banking system. 

Typically, Frank prefers pineapples and melons but being Frank he wasn’t about to let any cash money go unaccounted for. 

Needless to say, he was concerned about the estimated $20,000 in fivers & coins that still have the late Monarch’s image on them (a figure that Frank strongly denies stating “only lemons”).

We spoke to a manager at the bank who has “dealt” with Frank before. He told The Times,

“He got spooked over some clickbait about whether or not $5 notes and coins will remain legal tender and for how long etc. He called me a stupida-boy! Several times as I tried to calm him down”

A witness said it took several bank members to assure Frank that “of course” his money would still be considered legal tender. However Frank wasn’t about to take them at their word. Adding,

“Frank’s preference was a blood oath but the bank manager made it very clear he wasn’t prepared to slice into his flesh to appease Frank’s insane demands”

Ultimately, the bank manager wrote “itsa gonna be ok” on a deposit slip and was told in no uncertain terms what would happen if it wasn’t ok. 

Nevertheless, we understand that Frank is taking no chances and has advised his sons that they will come and exchange his fivers for “money I can trust”.

Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?

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