Burnt rubber aficionado, “Tex”, hasn’t let the constant sound of sirens or reports of power outages deter him from contributing to the storm aftermath shitshow.
A self confessed, “full time sikcunnnt”, Tex lives for the sweet release of a little road lubrication to add to his collection of grainy, vertically shot videos of frankly unimpressive burnouts.
In fact, unimpressive is being too kind according to his father who has born the brunt of Tex’s living costs lately,
“all the little freeloader does is bloody burnouts and he can’t even do one properly. Little turd still owes me $500 for denting up me Falcon after he lost control in the Maccas drive through”
Nevertheless, Tex considers both his circle work & burnouts to be worthy of a place in the Louvre. He’s an artist and sometimes the best art happens by mistake.
A view not shared by Western Power after Tex single handily took out the power to a whole street by sending it too hard around a wet corner and giving a powerline the ol’ left, right good night.
Witnesses to the act of boganry reported a somewhat dazed Tex getting out of the car only to make sure his idiot mate filming and captured the magic.
Witnesses further report that Tex opted against calling for any help in favour of reviewing the footage and making noises “that would make a drunk ape sound refined”.
Police arrived on the seen and upon looking up the car rego muttered to themselves, “this fucken idiot”. Naturally, it didn’t take police long to apprehend Tex given his history of incompetent vehicular manoeuvres.
Asked how he was going to like paying for the damage he did, Tex stated they would have to “wait in line, gotta pay the council back for all those bins I rammed too ay”
Well done Tex.
Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?