Bunbury has been torn apart today after a business decided to take a punt and hire a bloke from Collie.
It’s no secret that businesses all over the state are struggling for staff but some question if the local shop has properly respected the rivalry between the two towns.
We spoke to a staunch Bunbury local who claims he’s as Bunbury as it comes. Even exposing a home-job Hilzeez tattoo on his upper thigh. He told The Times,
“What has he invited into our town? You know what that lot do out there don’t ya? Bloody hope that kinda thing is contagious cos I like me sister being just me sister, catch me drift?”
However, an elder statesman in the community said he welcomed the move, and perhaps the two communities could coexist after all. Adding,
“I used to fear what I didn’t know too. I remember back in ‘09 we keyed a bunch of Collie Patrols that came down for the footy game between our towns. I was ignorant”
He looked noticeably ashamed as he continued his story,
“Then one day, I was off my cut at Fitzy’s and this girl saw me launch a massive bushies blow right into the middle of the dancefloor. Said she found me cute. Well, one thing lead to another and we did it at the foreshore. Afterward she told me she’d snuck in from Collie for a weekend. Now I’m pro Collie mate”
However, community leaders in Collie have expressed great concern. With a key stakeholder telling The Times,
“What if he brings back whatever he catches in Bunbury? You know what they do down there don’t ya? We’re still making a decision on whether the boy will be welcome back!”
It’s still too early to know if this grand experiment will work. Or whether the employee will need protection. Good luck young’n.
Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?
