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Thursday, September 03, 2026
The Bell Tower Times
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Sports

    Transperth tells Freo fans to get to traino now to ensure they make it in time for tomorrow’s game

    Transperth has told Freo fans that if they don’t want to miss the first quarter of tomorrow’s final against Hawthorn they’d better get to the…

    Belle September 2, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Giant red bin erected in Secret Harbour to commemorate by-election win

    Secret Harbour is waking up to the dawn of a new age. Not only did they vote to leave the EU but they have now…

    Belle August 31, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Travel

    Jetstar outdoes South African plane’s dangerously close flyover stunt by getting dangerously close to not cancelling a flight

    Rugby fans were left amazed and in need of new grundies after two Airlink planes performed a dangerously close flyover of DHL Stadium in Cape…

    Belle August 31, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Secret Harbour set to leave the EU after One Nation victory

    The first order of business for British outpost Secret Harbour is to break the shackles of what they feel is a bad deal as a…

    Belle August 30, 2026
    View More
  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Sports

    AFL scraps Wildcard Round effective immediately after Collingwood fail to make finals

    The AFL has announced that in hindsight it had wasted its and everyone else’s time with this wildcard malarkey after it failed to get Collingwood…

    Belle August 29, 2026
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Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS

7 Sources Clive Is Taking Advice From In His $300 Billion Battle Against Australia 

Belle March 31, 2023

A pack of emus in the Wheatbelt – like any battle, a legal one is all about strategy. So it’s only natural Clive has sought the…

View More 7 Sources Clive Is Taking Advice From In His $300 Billion Battle Against Australia 
Reckons

Top 10 Signs it’s Raining in Perf

Belle March 31, 2023

1. Witnessing more drenched Monster caps and Jet Pilot attire than at a buck’s party with a squirting show. As everyone knows an umbrella is…

View More Top 10 Signs it’s Raining in Perf
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Business

Gatorade Finally Takes Prime Seriously After Seeing What The Bottles Are Used For

Belle March 30, 2023 WA Culture

Gatorade has mostly discarded Prime hydration as a stupid fad that will eventually fade into obscurity. That’s until photo after photo emerged of the drink’s…

View More Gatorade Finally Takes Prime Seriously After Seeing What The Bottles Are Used For
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS

Kid caught with Prime assures school he was only trying to vape it, not drink the stuff

Belle March 30, 2023

A Perth school child has avoided disciplinary action today after being caught with a bottle of the banned “hydration” drink Prime. The school has banned…

View More Kid caught with Prime assures school he was only trying to vape it, not drink the stuff
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS

Retailer caught selling resealed Prime bottles containing human piss, fans noticed no difference 

Belle March 29, 2023

An unscrupulous WA retailer has been caught selling resealed Prime bottles containing a generous lashing of his own steaming hot piss. He got the idea…

View More Retailer caught selling resealed Prime bottles containing human piss, fans noticed no difference 
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Regional

Baysie To Replace Wrecked Fitzroy Crossing Bridge In A Last Minute Reprieve For The Hungry Girl

Belle March 29, 2023 Up NorthWA Culture

The WA Government has taken advantage of some convenient timing with the destruction of the Bayswater Bridge to commence in April and the commencement of…

View More Baysie To Replace Wrecked Fitzroy Crossing Bridge In A Last Minute Reprieve For The Hungry Girl

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TRENDING NEWS

  • Transperth tells Freo fans to get to traino now to ensure they make it in time for tomorrow’s game
  • Giant red bin erected in Secret Harbour to commemorate by-election win
  • Jetstar outdoes South African plane’s dangerously close flyover stunt by getting dangerously close to not cancelling a flight
  • Secret Harbour set to leave the EU after One Nation victory
  • AFL scraps Wildcard Round effective immediately after Collingwood fail to make finals
  • Donald Trump hits hole-in-one on the 12th at The Cut in Dawesville

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