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Wednesday, March 11, 2026
The Bell Tower Times
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Regional

    Mandurah develops space program after just 2 days without “certain websites”

    A mere 48 hours after big Wank decided to clamp down on Australia, Mandurah has announced it will be launching its first manned spaceship to…

    Belle March 10, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    New Freo Traffic Bridge fully completed after just 48 hours without “certain websites”

    A likely consequence of the Pornocalypse has been a major boost in the productivity of tradesman who are though to spend over half their day…

    Belle March 10, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Little shops selling cheap dodgy fuel & expensive American snacks pop up over night

    Little shops that seemingly only sell outrageously priced American snacks have pivoted into a new hustle after reading the room on the public’s fears over…

    Belle March 10, 2026
    View More
  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Politics

    Roger Cook’s removalist truck expected in West Perth by 2030 after hitting Kwinana Freeway traffic

    Western Australian Premier Roger Cook has done what many SOR have dreamt of doing for years – escaping Kwinana. Citing the need to be closer…

    Belle March 9, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Sports

    Tom Hanks chose GWS match as he was searching for a deserted location for Cast Away 2

    Tom Hanks was spotted at the GWS v Hawthorn match yesterday much to the surprise of the handful of punters in attendance. However, it wasn’t…

    Belle March 8, 2026
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BREAKING NEWS Featured

Boat Ramps Prepare for Big Day of “Incompetence or Insurance Job” Game

Belle October 16, 2021

There’s nothing like excellent Summer weather on the weekend to stoke the nautical wiles of WA’s weekend warrior boating community. You know what they say,…

View More Boat Ramps Prepare for Big Day of “Incompetence or Insurance Job” Game
BREAKING NEWS Featured

Inquiry Held as to Why Sacha Baron Cohen Hasn’t Posted Obligatory Quokka Selfie Yet

Belle October 15, 2021

Western Australians are understandably shocked that a celebrity has entered the state and hasn’t fulfilled their obligation of “selling us to the world” via Rotto…

View More Inquiry Held as to Why Sacha Baron Cohen Hasn’t Posted Obligatory Quokka Selfie Yet
From the Zoo

IN FOCUS: The Conti Roll

Belle October 14, 2021

The rest of the nation assumes that the native delicacy of Western Australia is a red dirt & ice burger served with a secessionist sentiment…

View More IN FOCUS: The Conti Roll
BREAKING NEWS Featured

Bloke Who Lies About Knowing Bikies Vows Laws Won’t Stop him Wearing his Sons of Anarchy Merch

Belle October 13, 2021

Belmont man, Brandon, has vowed that he and his imaginary 1%’er mates will never bow down to the WA Government’s tough new anti-bikie laws which…

View More Bloke Who Lies About Knowing Bikies Vows Laws Won’t Stop him Wearing his Sons of Anarchy Merch
BREAKING NEWS Featured

Clive Palmer to Sue High Court for Constantly Ruling Against Him

Belle October 13, 2021

It seems the High Court’s most recent decision against Clive Palmer was the straw that broke the camel’s back.  With the mining magnate swearing to…

View More Clive Palmer to Sue High Court for Constantly Ruling Against Him
BREAKING NEWS Featured

Perth Tradies Launch Class Action Against “Discriminatory” Happy Hour Times

Belle October 12, 2021

A group of Perth tradies has sought legal advice to launch a class action against the majority of Perth pubs for the happy norm being…

View More Perth Tradies Launch Class Action Against “Discriminatory” Happy Hour Times

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TRENDING NEWS

  • Mandurah develops space program after just 2 days without “certain websites”
  • New Freo Traffic Bridge fully completed after just 48 hours without “certain websites”
  • Little shops selling cheap dodgy fuel & expensive American snacks pop up over night
  • Roger Cook’s removalist truck expected in West Perth by 2030 after hitting Kwinana Freeway traffic
  • Tom Hanks chose GWS match as he was searching for a deserted location for Cast Away 2
  • Cott residents demand “Eco-Barrier” be moved to Stirling Highway to stop creatures reaching Sculptures by the Sea

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