Perth Bottlos Welcome Origin For Chance To Finally Clear Eastern State’s Swill From Shelves

You may get a fair few blank expressions if you ask Western Australians what they think about Origin. Safe to say, WA isn’t an NRL kinda place. 

Unless of course, you are a licensee that’s been hanging for the chance to get unwanted Eastern State swill off their shelves. It’s like X-Mas just with more interstate bogans.

We spoke to an owner of a local bottlo who told The Times,

“Finally, a chance to get this shit off my shelves. We’ve had plenty of punters fly over from Queensland & NSW and they are very particular about the beers they drink. All tastes like human piss to me but what would I know”

Another bottlo owner Jack even managed to rescue a few 6’ers of Tooheys from the bargain bin and put em back on display at full price,

“I reckon I could charge double and they’d still pay it. On the one hand, it’s pretty distressing having so many NRL people in your shop but on the other, I’ll never have to look at these unwanted cartons that have been haunting me for months”

We spoke to a Maroons supporter who claims that if he doesn’t get at least 3L of XXXX in per day he might croak. He told The Times,

“Wanna know me blood type mate? 4 X mate. My wife says I’ve slowly turned into a can of Milton Mango. I tried some WA piss and almost spewed mate, you carnts need to get a proper tinnie up ya”

Similarly, we caught up with a NSW Blues fan that said his body was a Toohey’s temple and he’d need at least half a carton in him if he’s going to punch on with Maroon’s supporters later. He added, 

“You ever tried getting into a blue with mid strength Gage Roads beer in your belly? Can’t be done, mate. So I’m going preload like an animal so I’m ready to express myself the way an NRL fan likes to, mate”

Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?

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