Maccas, Navionics & dad’s birthday – the rise and fall of a notorious fishing spot thief

One of Perth’s most notorious spot-pinchers has struck again after laying low for over 5 months. Mostly on account of no one wanting to take him out fishing anymore. 

On 3 August 2022, Jack saw an excellent opportunity to get up to his old tricks when an old friend Karl got back into contact after a chance meeting at the pub. Blissfully ignorant of the monster that Jack had become. 

In good faith, Karl took Jack out on his boat to a cheeky little spot his dad had shown him when he was a kid. A special location for the old friends to reunite and catch up on the old days. Alas, Jack had more sinister motivations. 

Jack’s grand ruse started even before they had set out on the boat. Bringing his mate 2 bacon & egg McMuffins, 1 sausage & egg McMuffin, 3 hashbrowns, and an extra large coffee. 

It was a depth charge that he knew would explode in his mate’s guts in 40-45minutes – the time needed to get to the secret spot, in Jack’s estimations. 

Just like clockwork, the pair cast a few lines and Karl announced he had to go and exorcise some tummy demons in the shitter. It was his time to strike. 

Jack pulled out his Navionics app, marked the spot and then had a little rummage on his Karl’s onboard GPS. It was an all-you-can-steal buffet and Jack’s appetite was seemingly ravenous. 

The pair fished, laughed and went out for a pub feed after. By all accounts, it was the perfect day and Karl left feeling a sense of friendship and warmth. Oh, how wrong he was. 

In true Jack form, he was back at the spot the very next day. Thinking there was no chance his mate would go fishing two days in a row. Alas, fate had other ideas. 

What Jack didn’t know was that it was Karl’s dad’s birthday and they had planned to hit up the spot. Especially after the success he had with Jack the previous day. 

You can only imagine Karl’s surprise when he arrived at his special fishing spot to see Jack plundering the oceans. Without any shame, Jack greeted the duo with a shit-eating grin, “cheers for showing me this spot, mate”

Karl needed 3 showers after that trip just to get the dirty feeling of being used off him. He realised he was merely a prawn in Jack’s elaborate net of deceit. He’d given him a chance and paid the ultimate price. 

Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?