City of Freo considers banning bicycles to address high rates of bike theft

It’s a familiar sight in Freo community groups each morning. Another resident frustratingly separated from their two-wheeled chariots. It’s no secret that Freo is one of the best places in Perth to have your bike ganked. 

So to tackle the unacceptable levels of bike theft in Freo, a radical plan has been proposed to the local Council – ban ownership of the bikes – you can’t have something stolen from you if you don’t own it!

The proposal is the brainchild of a e-Scooter private seller who denies his thoughts are riddled with self interest. He told The Times,

“Will I stand to benefit from the proposal? Yes. Will it also reduce bike theft to like 0? Also yes, so that’s a win win any way you look at it”

WA Police have also praised the proposal stating that the matter of stolen bikes does take up a lot of their time. An unofficial spokesperson told The Times,

“No one ever gets a stolen bike back mate. Maybe if it’s one of those fancy racing ones because your average petty crim doesn’t have the network to offload a $15k bike. It’s really just a massive drain on our phone line and the reports are tiresome to write out”

A source close to the Council says it’s an interesting proposal because it’d be great to take the 100% reduction in bike theft into the next local election. However, they are concerned the residents would miss owning, riding and enjoying their bikes,

“It’s a doozie, it’d look great in the quarterly reports and has the support of the police but not everyone wants to be an e-Scooter douche. It’s a tricky one”

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