international women's day perth

Apprentice Spends Day Nervously Giggling At Every Tradie Wishing Him A Nice International Women’s Day

Young Simon endured a barrage of IWD jokes from every tradie on-site starting with his boss bringing in a bra for the youngin to wear. The gag was branded an instant classic.

In fact, Trev laughed so hard he managed to choke on a bite of his sausage roll. Onlookers reported that the man’s face resembled Blue’s cluesack while in heat. 

The quick-thinking apprentice was first to lend a hand, slapping the man on the back and helping to dislodge the grotesquely sized specimen of poorly chewed sausage roll. 

Once he regained full consciousness he turned to the apprentice and said, “thank god they let you out of the kitchen today sweetheart”, before slapping his buttocks and wishing the boy a happy IWD. 

We spoke to a witness who had this to say,

“You gotta hand it to Trev, he was knocking on the pearly gates and still came through with an IWD gag, that’s commitment. Some say Trev is living in the past but a few years ago he would’ve physically assaulted someone for even mentioning the concept of a day for women so that’s progress, mate”

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As the day went on, Simon found it tougher to force laughter at the repetitive joke and was accused of having a “sandy vag” by leading hand Davo. Simone told The Times,

“I didn’t think I could handle much more of the fun until smoko when I found a tampon in my ham sandwich, apparently to help with the sand. If anything they were consistent with the theme”

Simon looked down on his phone after receiving a message. It was a photo of a washing machine with the message “sum of the boys chip in got ay pressie hahaha”. He sighed and continued,

I was tempted to say enough but I reckon one of the Scaffies on site was just looking for an opportunity to escalate the hazing. I’d seen him lock a bloke in the portaloo and try to boot it over one year, so I just figured I’d keep cool”

We asked Simon if the hazing bothered him, he replied,

To be honest, the three female tradies on site have done more work this morning than Davo has done in a month, it’s more of a compliment coming from that sack of shit”.

Davo on the other hand vehemently denied the jokes were getting stale adding,

“Oi, oi, nahhhh, bloody rippers coming outta the boys today, wait until tools down we’re gonna bring the boy out a glass of that pink rose wine shit. We’ll all be sinking tinnies and he’s got a pink drink”

Davo couldn’t conclude the interview on account of laughing so hard he almost went into cardiac arrest. 

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Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?