Police confirm Ford Rangers were added to fleet because to catch a criminal you have to think like a criminal

In a rare moment of transparency, the Western Australian Police Force has admitted that the reason they added the Ford Ranger to their fleet was to get an inside into the mind of the criminals they are out to capture.

This was based on research that found the Ford Ranger emerged as the car of choice for outlaws after the decline of the trusty Holden Commodore. A spokesperson for the Police told The Times,

“Our evidence which is now backed up by this study shows there is an overrepresentation of scumbag who choose to drive a Ford Ranger. So we added them to our fleet to give our officers an edge, know thy enemy etc”

While Police haven’t released any data on whether the experiment was successful, a few officers have told The Times anecdotally that it helped a lot. Adding,

To check out some prime Police Ford Ranger action tap HERE.

“After just a week driving in the Ranger I was seeing things I hadn’t noticed before. For example, I’d look at an ATM and think – geez that’d be worth a tug, if I was a lowlife I’d be attaching a chain to that one and skulldragging it out”

Naturally, harnessing such a powerful tool does come with some risks. Many officers reported that their base level of anger increased to a concerning level while driving the vehicles.

Another officer had to deploy breathing exercises after being told they had to go wait in the overflow bay at a McDonalds. He told The Times,

“The cars were to help us think like a criminal not become one. I think it’s pure hubris to think you can just dabble in that level of rage and come out unscathed”

We understand that the officer in question reported himself and has now been relegated to Skoda duty for the foreseeable future.

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