All of Perth’s Energy Sources To Be Replaced By Single Wind Turbine On St Georges Terrace

A recent study of St Georges Terrace has determined that enough raw wind power blasts through the cIty corridor every day to generate more than enough power to handle all of Perth’s energy needs. 

Accordingly, by 2025 the city is unlikely to need a single kW of power from coal plants. Meaning Perth is leading the way in something other than the percentage of meth in our wastewater. 

Perth has long been known as the windiest city in Australia – with citizens regularly getting blown to shit going about their daily business. However, the Terrace wind tunnel takes even fewer prisoners. 

A leading energy expert said he fears the St Georges Terrace Wind Turbine may generate too much power as us mere mortals are unable to control just how much of a blowfest the Terrace will run each day.

He told The Bell Tower Times,

“There is a fear that this may be the next solar panel shemozzle. The last thing we want to do is overload the grid on days where there isn’t much of a demand for heating or cooling but it’s still gusty as all fark outside. Nice and Perf like”

So the obvious answer would be some decent batteries to store the excess power the turbine produces for a rainy day. WA’s Energy Minister is currently waiting on Elon Musk to respond to his tweets to make this happen. 

Of course, WA has another trick up its sleeves – a crypto farm rebate system. A decent farm can be an absolutely tremendous power leech and on days where Perth is blowing harder than an Instagram model looking for a sponsorship, they’ll need them to eat up what the grid is spitting out. 

There are plans to introduce a similar system in Geraldton however the State will really need the local hydro growers to step up their setups to handle the crazy amount of energy a Gero wind turbine would produce.

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