WA To Build Potato Proof Fence In Anticipation Of Potential Dutton Reprisals

Western Australia is taking measures to mitigate the risk of an irate Peter Dutton storming state lines looking for satisfaction over Marko’s claims he’s a bit of a dimwit. 

A spokesperson for the WA Government told The Times that now was not the time to let our guard down,

“Obviously, Dutton has a lot of time on his hands now and you can bet he’s going to be looking to settle some scores. Ask any chef, there’s nothing more dangerous than a rogue hot potato”

Intel has suggested that Dutton has expressed his desire to go “Queensland style” on the Premier. It is unclear exactly what this means but you can bet it’s nothing good. 

Intelligence analysts have stated that Dutton has other reasons to cross into Westralia other than just to dish out some ol’ outback cop justice on the Premier. Telling The Times,

“The real risk is that he’s going to sit out on our beautiful shorelines with his binoculars looking for Chinese ships. He’s obviously lost access to all the fan dangled tech so he’ll have to find these ships the old way”

A spokesperson for the WA Government said having Dutton camping out on WA’s pristine coastline was “unacceptable”. Adding,

“Imagine you’re having a lovely morning walk and this round-headed chap tries to suck you into some kind of rort or get you to confirm that the tanker he sees offshore is clearly a Chinese vessel. I don’t know about you but that would put me off my morning coffee”

Accordingly, the potato-proof fence will run from the state’s top northern point all the way down to its most southern point. 

Of course, a spokesperson for the opposition has told The Times that the acting opposition leader has no interest in ever coming to WA. Adding, 

“If you think Marko’s comments hurt his feelings then think again. What he is really hurt about is the WA swing against his party. WA is just bad memories for Mr. Dutton so you really don’t have to bother with the potato proof fence”

Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?

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