Progressive Bogan Plans to Wear Aussie Flag Cape At Half Mast Tomorrow

An unusually progressive Rockingham man has decided to acknowledge the sensitivities around the 26th of January in a truly unique way. He will be wearing his Aussie flag cape at half mast while performing his chants and punching on tomorrow. 

Grabbing a length of thin rope from his neighbour’s boat, Damo fashioned the cheap, Chinese made cape around his waist before cracking his first “Aus Day Eve” froff. He told The Times,

“I’m not going out tomorrow to ruin everyone’s day ya know. Just a couple of cunnys with a staring problem. I reckon ya gotta make everyone feel included and shit. So this is me way of saying, I hear ya, and I acknowledge yas”

He went on to make it clear that the day’s meaning was more about getting farked up by the foreshore than any national pride.

He said he wouldn’t sit quietly inside though because day drinking is what he does on his day off (and 60% of his work days ha ha ha – he mused).

Not only will Damo wear his flag cape at half mast but he’s also ditching the Aussie flag stubby holders that he usually wears as bracelets of power. Telling The Times,

“Yeah nah, that ain’t about that mate, I just reckon stubby holders slow me down. No beer is gonna last 2 minutes in me paw anyways ha ha but yeah, nah nah nah, trying to tone it down ya know”

A truly touching gesture from Damo. Now if only he can break his record today of a 5pm paddywagon ride we’d say he’s truly a progressive bogan. 

RELATED: Rocko Man Starts Dazzling Display of Patriotism With Chinese Made Flags on Car

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