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Monday, August 31, 2026
The Bell Tower Times
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Giant red bin erected in Secret Harbour to commemorate by-election win

    Secret Harbour is waking up to the dawn of a new age. Not only did they vote to leave the EU but they have now…

    Belle August 31, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Travel

    Jetstar outdoes South African plane’s dangerously close flyover stunt by getting dangerously close to not cancelling a flight

    Rugby fans were left amazed and in need of new grundies after two Airlink planes performed a dangerously close flyover of DHL Stadium in Cape…

    Belle August 31, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Secret Harbour set to leave the EU after One Nation victory

    The first order of business for British outpost Secret Harbour is to break the shackles of what they feel is a bad deal as a…

    Belle August 30, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Sports

    AFL scraps Wildcard Round effective immediately after Collingwood fail to make finals

    The AFL has announced that in hindsight it had wasted its and everyone else’s time with this wildcard malarkey after it failed to get Collingwood…

    Belle August 29, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Donald Trump hits hole-in-one on the 12th at The Cut in Dawesville

    Some say it’s nearly impossible to ace the 12th at The Cut against the howling Mandurah breeze but US President Donald Trump proved the haters…

    Belle August 28, 2026
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Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Regional

Rio Tinto asks police to run a Geiger counter over that big mystery capsule thing to make sure it wasn’t another of theirs

Belle July 17, 2023

It reportedly panic stations at Rio Tinto today when the mining company heard the news of a large capsule-esque mystery object had washed up on…

View More Rio Tinto asks police to run a Geiger counter over that big mystery capsule thing to make sure it wasn’t another of theirs
mystery object mid west coast
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Regional

Mystery object already on bricks and stripped for parts after washing up on WA’s Mid West coast

Belle July 17, 2023

Authorities have confirmed the mystery object “didn’t stand a chance” after it washed up in Green Head which is situated close to such towns as…

View More Mystery object already on bricks and stripped for parts after washing up on WA’s Mid West coast
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Sports

Serbian workmate taking a few “Novak” length toilet breaks to avoid discussing Wimbeldon final

Belle July 17, 2023

Jovan, a Serbian/Australian staff member of a mid-tier firm in the city has been deploying tactical “Novak” length toilet breaks today to avoid having to…

View More Serbian workmate taking a few “Novak” length toilet breaks to avoid discussing Wimbeldon final
Bell Tower Times From the Zoo

10 Signs Your Perth Suburb Is Getting Gentrified Up The Wazoo 

Belle July 16, 2023

More and more boomers sniffing around – a millennial wanting to buy a property is like a drop of blood in the real estate ocean. It…

View More 10 Signs Your Perth Suburb Is Getting Gentrified Up The Wazoo 
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS From the Zoo

9 RULES FOR SUCCESS (according to a guy who posts photos of himself standing next to other people’s luxury cars)

Belle July 16, 2023

Wake up at 3am but go to sleep on Perth time and wake up on Sydney time. While you lose hours in your sleep I…

View More 9 RULES FOR SUCCESS (according to a guy who posts photos of himself standing next to other people’s luxury cars)
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

REPORT: state of bachelor’s kitchen tiles now somewhere between Clubba and Hip-E Club D-floors

Belle July 15, 2023

It took some doing but Perth bachelor and all-round swine of a man Tim has managed to transform his kitchen tiles into the old Club…

View More REPORT: state of bachelor’s kitchen tiles now somewhere between Clubba and Hip-E Club D-floors

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TRENDING NEWS

  • Giant red bin erected in Secret Harbour to commemorate by-election win
  • Jetstar outdoes South African plane’s dangerously close flyover stunt by getting dangerously close to not cancelling a flight
  • Secret Harbour set to leave the EU after One Nation victory
  • AFL scraps Wildcard Round effective immediately after Collingwood fail to make finals
  • Donald Trump hits hole-in-one on the 12th at The Cut in Dawesville
  • AFL Requires proof of 10 Years of Social Media Meltdowns to Buy Flagmantle finals tickets

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