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The Bell Tower Times

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Thursday, November 06, 2025
The Bell Tower Times
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Pilbara Man Establishes Dominance by Refusing to Shoo Flies from Face In Front of Perth Coworkers

    Being born in the Pilbara, Rory swallowed 3 whole flies before he’d even left his mother’s womb as an infant. Some say the additional protein…

    Belle November 5, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Tradie notoriously careless with his screws & nails admits he’s on the payroll of big tyre

    A local Perth tradesman who is thought to be responsible for over 1000 ruined tyres per month has finally admitted his patented carelessness with nails…

    Belle November 5, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Entertainment

    Ageing millennial never feels older than when looking at a festival line up

    A festival poster stuck to a fence has once again ruined an ageing millennials day as he did his best to recognise more than 1…

    Belle November 5, 2025
    View More
  • Bell Tower Times Business Entertainment

    Central accommodation, a feed and already dressed for his date with the Magistrate, Ascot race day Bogan winning

    A Perth bogan who found himself over refreshed and dangerously gee’d up has been counting his blessings while sitting in his piss soaked trousers at…

    Belle November 4, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Entertainment

    Piss-test fail warning given to anyone within a kilometre radius of the Metallica pit 

    Authorities have put out an alert that it is highly likely you may fail a piss-test tomorrow if you were within a kilometre of the…

    Belle November 2, 2025
    View More

From the Zoo

IN FOCUS: Perth’s Urban Sprawl

Belle June 8, 2021

Suck shit, Sochi, Russia – Perf is now believed to be the world champion at urban sprawl. From Two Rocks to Singleton, this bad boy…

View More IN FOCUS: Perth’s Urban Sprawl
From the Zoo

IN FOCUS: Canning Highway

Belle June 6, 2021

If Stirling Highway is the Ted Bundy of people’s will to live then Canning Highway is surely a sad little copycat trying to grasp at…

View More IN FOCUS: Canning Highway
Sports, Auto & Hobbies

Mr E-Plate

Belle June 5, 2021 BoganCrimehoon

The only extraordinary aspect of Reece’s vehicular delinquency is the fact he has managed to write off every form of transport he has ever owned.…

View More Mr E-Plate
Reckons

A Guide to Being a Verge Scab

Belle June 4, 2021

The end is dawning on kerb-crawling filth as more and more councils have opted to end verge side collections. Thus, its never been more important…

View More A Guide to Being a Verge Scab
Work & Study

Ms HR Manager

Belle June 2, 2021 corporateprofessional

Natasha is an HR manager and while her job description is to manage people, in reality, her day is spent finding ways to justify the…

View More Ms HR Manager
Uncategorized BREAKING NEWS Reckons

Mounts Bay Speed Camera Voted Public Servant of the Year

Belle June 2, 2021

The speed camera that sits on Mounts Bay Road, affectionately dubbed “Trust Fund” by the State Government, has been  awarded the Public Servant of the Year…

View More Mounts Bay Speed Camera Voted Public Servant of the Year

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TRENDING NEWS

  • Pilbara Man Establishes Dominance by Refusing to Shoo Flies from Face In Front of Perth Coworkers
  • Tradie notoriously careless with his screws & nails admits he’s on the payroll of big tyre
  • Ageing millennial never feels older than when looking at a festival line up
  • Central accommodation, a feed and already dressed for his date with the Magistrate, Ascot race day Bogan winning
  • Piss-test fail warning given to anyone within a kilometre radius of the Metallica pit 
  • Royal Family tells loyal subjects that the most horrific punishment they could think of for Andrew was making him one of you

SUPPORT THE BTT

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  • Perth Driver Accused Of Being A Witch After Failing To Slam Brakes Upon Entering Tunnel
  • Leering Tradie Alleges He Was Catfished After Driver Of P-Plated Suzuki Swift Turned Out To Be Middle Aged Man
  • Crack team of Pilbara miners sent to UK to assure them their heatwave was nothing 
  • Moving down train carriage far too similar to merging for Perth to feel comfortable attempting
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