Traffic Chaos In Perth’s North As Eager Brits Rush To Soak Up Perfect Beach Weather 

A normally peaceful morning in Perth’s northern suburbs has erupted into chaos as residents rushed to the coast to get a big slice of British beach culture. 

Charlie hadn’t even successfully put his boardshorts in his haste to get to his car. Almost leaving his two 10 year old boys behind. He told The Times,

“Lovely little day to be by the seaside, innit. All the relatives back home are sending photos of their English summers and I couldn’t resist showing the boys what I grew up with”

Linda also had British beach fever when she saw the bleak forecast and cancelled her usual morning whinge at Dome. She told The Times,

“Australians don’t understand propah beach weavah. They go when the sand is so hot it attacks you! No, this is the kind of day that reminds me of a good English summer, I only wish there were more pebbles covering the sand”

Naturally, the surge in road traffic caused some minor incidents. With proud Englishman Ross tail-ending a driver after lapsing into a daydream about all the British bikini babes he was going to lay his eyes on,

“Had a bit of a bone-ah if I’m honest mate, a day like this back home and everyone from the high street to the beaches would be a total T&A parade mate. I must’ve drifted off *laughs limeishly*”

Maddy was smarter than the rest. Deeming the current 18-degree forecast to be a little hot and decided to wait until the rush had eased,

“Me and the hubby will go around 4 for some fish & chips on the sand, just when the day has cooled off a bit. It’s like I’m in Yorkshire”

WA Health authorities said they were stoked that residents were enjoying the weather but urged them to take precautions, 

“Same rules apply to an Aussie day at the beach, slip, slop slap! Every stormy day we treat Brits for heat-related ailments and let us tell you and it’s not pretty. Bring plenty of water and a beach umbrella if you can”

Anyone heading to the beach this morning are advised to check traffic reports because once Melbourne residents living over here catch wind of the conditions then the roads could be truly scary. 

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