Albo Given A Full Briefing On All Variations Of The CBomb Ahead of Port Hedland Visit

Albo’s minders have made sure the Canberra bubble pollie was fully across the cbomb brief ahead of his trip to Port Hedland for a major conference. Knowing the difference between a positive and negative cbomb is vital to one’s survival in regional WA. 

A local regional WA linguistics expert told The Times that the PM was dismissive of the brief at first, claiming he grew up in public housing and knew a thing or two about the word. However, after just 45 minutes into the presentation, he admitted that it could get confusing at times. A source told The Times,

“Some are easier than others. For example shitcunt and goodcunt. You know where you stand with those but sickcunt deffs threw the PM. He asked whether that meant he was a ill or something. We told him it was one of the highest honours and when he has it yelled at him from across the street he should feel proud”

To aid in his education, the PM was told to start dropping cbombs to his own entourage. A necessary but awkward practice at times. A witness told The Times,

Related: Albo Pledges Funding For Regional Art After Learning Hedland’s Most Famous Mural Was Removed

“Someone on his entourage showed them a recent photo of his puppy and Albo laughed and called him a dogcunt. Now he got that one wrong and doing that in the field, especially Port Hedland can be fatal. We alerted him that dogcunt was reserved for the worst of the worst. Even though we love dogs. It’s not very consistent”

During the training Albo asked if he could refer to his upbringing as a “poorcunt”. He was advised that one too was problematic. A witness told The Times,

“Yeah he’s right in a way but poor can refer to both financial stature as well as character standing. So poorcunt is probably not the best way to describe yourself. I mean, I wouldn’t”

Instead, Albo was advised to refer to himself as a loosecunt in reference to him being called a loose unit back in the day. Also very high praise in the Port Hedland community. 

RELATED: Albo Extends Stay In Kalgoorlie After Learning About The 6am Froffs

Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?