BREAKING: VFL Inconsolable Over Missing a Carlton vs. Collingwood Grand Final

The VFL or as it’s technically known as the AFL is struggling to find any enjoyment this evening after the Brisbane Lions deprived them of an all-Victorian grand final. The VFL officials and commentators just about needed a fresh pair of pants during the first quarter when Carlton surged to a 5-goal lead early on.

Alas, it wasn’t to last and the Lions took the game on and ended up victorious. Every goal the home team scored sent the VFL into fits of anguish and depression.

A source close to Gil told The Times that the big man was tempted to just call off the GF after being robbed of the fairytale GF. Adding,

“Brisbane has ruined everything. Gil isn’t happy. I think the commentary team will need therapy to be honest. It’s very distressing for them”

We understand that the AFL will be asking some serious questions of the umpires of how they couldn’t do more to sway the desired outcome. A spokesperson added,

“We did all we could with the tribunal results and we expected the umpires to do more during this game. They did very well last night just ask Toby Greene!”

Commiserations VFL, you had high hopes but it wasn’t to be. Be kind to yourself and get the therapy you need.

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