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Sunday, April 12, 2026
The Bell Tower Times
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Sports

    Geelong arrives at wrong oval after being drawn to available farming land

    Oofff, the mighty Geelong Cats have found themselves caught in a farm-trance on their way to Norwood oval this morning. Despite clearly putting in the…

    Belle April 12, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Sports

    Blow for Flagmantle as Mason Cox drafted to America

    Flagmantle’s 3 ruck dream has hit a major snag after new recruit Mason Cox was drafted to America pursuant to new laws enacted by their…

    Belle April 11, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Politics

    AFP drop Ben Roberts-Smith prosecution after some bloke from Mandurah tells them they have fark all

    The AFP has sensationally dropped all charges against Ben Roberts-Smith after some bloke from Mandurah launched a grammarless tirade against them on Facebook today. In…

    Belle April 10, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

    Middle-aged Scarborough gent confident girls will never question his age if he never stops wearing surf wear 

    A Scabs bachelor on the wrong side of 40 is confident that the girls half his age he habitually tries to converse with are none-the-wiser…

    Belle April 10, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Regional

    New Servo Supply Fears as Cargo Ship Full of Cheese Sausages Stuck in Strait of Hormuz

    First, it was fuel, now it’s something much bleaker for humanity – a shortage of cheese sausages is imminent in Australia after a ship full…

    Belle April 9, 2026
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BREAKING NEWS Featured

INVESTIGATION: Is the Throw Rug & Pillow Industry Taking the Piss?

Belle November 28, 2021

They say the greatest trick the devil ever played was convincing society that they need to spend $500 on useless pieces of shit bed decorations…

View More INVESTIGATION: Is the Throw Rug & Pillow Industry Taking the Piss?
Featured Party & Entertainment

Mr Swan River Booze Cruise

Belle November 28, 2021 Party

Move over blue/green algae outbreaks, Brett is the grossest thing floating on top of the Swan River. Today, Brett’s celebrating his buck’s party and has…

View More Mr Swan River Booze Cruise
Bell Tower Times Featured Perth & WA Locations

Ms Cottesloe Beach

Belle November 27, 2021 beachGolden TriangleInstagram

It’s hot out, so Cass heads to Perth’s most iconic amateur modelling competition: Cottesloe Beach. En route, she stops off at the Boatshed to stock…

View More Ms Cottesloe Beach
Party & Entertainment Featured

Mr Dunsborough Toolie

Belle November 21, 2021 BoganDouth

Damo graduated in 2004 and had the time of his life on his Leavers break down in Dunsborough so to remind himself of when he…

View More Mr Dunsborough Toolie
BREAKING NEWS Featured

REPORT: Attempts At Post Lunch Beers Productivity Just A Macabre Charade

Belle November 19, 2021 office

Jeremy hasn’t done a fucken thing since about 11:45 this morning when he left his workstation to feast on a tray of leftover pastries in…

View More REPORT: Attempts At Post Lunch Beers Productivity Just A Macabre Charade
From the Zoo

IN FOCUS: The Company Golf Day

Belle November 16, 2021 officesports

When you combine a marketing budget with a vague corporate notion of “networking” you get the corporate golf day. Everyone’s favourite tax-deductible piss-up on the…

View More IN FOCUS: The Company Golf Day

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TRENDING NEWS

  • Geelong arrives at wrong oval after being drawn to available farming land
  • Blow for Flagmantle as Mason Cox drafted to America
  • AFP drop Ben Roberts-Smith prosecution after some bloke from Mandurah tells them they have fark all
  • Middle-aged Scarborough gent confident girls will never question his age if he never stops wearing surf wear 
  • New Servo Supply Fears as Cargo Ship Full of Cheese Sausages Stuck in Strait of Hormuz
  • Trump claims to have negotiated a ceasefire between Thornlie & Maddington

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