Footy Dad Apologises To Umpire After Accidently Treating Him Like A Human Being

A Perth footy dad has formally apologised to an umpire after a “moment of madness” saw him address the man with respect. It was a shocking scene that everyone is still trying to comprehend. 

We spoke to a witness at the game that said the crowd went silent after the dad waited for the umpires to walk past before non-sarcastically telling him he was doing a “good job”. The witness added,

“We all say things in the heat of the moment and you could tell that Wayne instantly regretted what he said. The umpire just looked at him in shock. Mouth wide open. Wayne had to take a walk to calm himself down after that”

After the incident, Wayne was seen leaving the oval and letting the umpire’s tyres down to help restore a little bit of balance. The senseless vandalism was a nice gesture but it didn’t erase what had happened. Wayne’s mate told The Times,

“Always wondered about Wayno, ya know? Batting for the other team. Here at under 16’s we vicariously live our failed sporting careers through our kids and a big part of that is taking it all out on the umpires trying to facilitate the game. That’s how we roll”

After the game, Wayne approached the umpire with his head hung in shame. Holding back tears, he went to shake the young man’s hand before retracting the gesture at the last minute and reverting his open palm to a raised middle finger. A witness told The Times,

“He said he promised it would never happen again and if he ever calls ball on his son again he’ll follow him home. You could tell the umpire was relieved. The universe made sense again”

Wayne has subsequently enrolled in anger mismanagement classes to ensure it never happens again. One day at a time Wayne. You big freak. 

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