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Monday, April 06, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

    REPORT: Easter Sunday hands down the seediest day of the Easter long weekend

    A recent study by the Department of Getting On It has found Easter Sunday to be hands down the seediest day of the Easter Long…

    Belle April 5, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

    Police called to Perth Maccas after man explains his 5 Fillet-O-Fish order has nothing to do with Good Friday

    A Perth McDonalds has been left scrambling for answers today after a man boldly entered the store and ordered 5 Fillet-O-Fish burgers without even a…

    Belle April 3, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

    Local Seagulls Thank Catholic Guilt As They Prepare For Their Biggest Day Of The Year

    Good Friday is the official seagull grand final with over 500% more fish & chip munching families to terrorise in their endless pursuit for a…

    Belle April 3, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

    Local mum reconsiders catholic guilt as cost-of-living means ol mate Cap’n Birds Eye is coming for lunch

    Local mum Patricia has seriously questioned her annual display of faith after realising that the weekend budget doesn’t allow for the frills of bougie fish…

    Belle April 3, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Politics

    WA to Invoke Emergency Powers to Divert Froffs to Those Who Forgot to Stock Up Before Good Friday

    Roger Cook has called a special press conference to announce WA will be invoking emergency powers to stop the indignity of the Good Friday booze…

    Belle April 2, 2026
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Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Technology & Finance

New Study Reveals Spud King’s Body Hair Surpasses Arctic Wear in Warming Efficiency

Belle July 5, 2023

Australian consumers could soon be wearing a Galati-leg-hair-Gilet or a full body hair sleeping bag after a groundbreaking study has revealed that the spud king’s…

View More New Study Reveals Spud King’s Body Hair Surpasses Arctic Wear in Warming Efficiency
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

Art Attack Reboot Planned Where Neil Smashes Piss While Painting To Appeal To Millennial Audience

Belle July 5, 2023

Finally! Art Attack is coming back to the screens in a modern re-envisioning where Neil will spend most of the episode getting pissed as he…

View More Art Attack Reboot Planned Where Neil Smashes Piss While Painting To Appeal To Millennial Audience
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Sports

BREAKING: The Thames Now 100% Salt Water After Flood Of English Tears

Belle July 4, 2023

The mighty Thames has been reclassified from brackish water to a 100% pure marine environment after the weekend saw countless gigalitres of English tears flow…

View More BREAKING: The Thames Now 100% Salt Water After Flood Of English Tears
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS From the Zoo

How to get the most tax back from those ATO dogs

Belle July 4, 2023

G’day Keifo here. Not surprisingly, I deal with dumb dogs every day and it has become my mission to replace the shit between your ears…

View More How to get the most tax back from those ATO dogs
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Sports

English coworker lashes “Aussie spirit” after leaving meeting early and missing out on pastries 

Belle July 3, 2023

“It’s just not cricket, mate”, office pombag Greg mused as he reflected on all the flakey delights he forfeited when he decided to chuck a wobbly…

View More English coworker lashes “Aussie spirit” after leaving meeting early and missing out on pastries 
Bell Tower Times From the Zoo Sports

7 Types Of Cretins You Can’t Avoid This Ashes Series

Belle July 3, 2023 cricketsports

The Ashes is one of the hottest competitions between England & Australia. Naturally, not everyone is on their best behaviour during this series. Here are…

View More 7 Types Of Cretins You Can’t Avoid This Ashes Series

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TRENDING NEWS

  • REPORT: Easter Sunday hands down the seediest day of the Easter long weekend
  • Police called to Perth Maccas after man explains his 5 Fillet-O-Fish order has nothing to do with Good Friday
  • Local Seagulls Thank Catholic Guilt As They Prepare For Their Biggest Day Of The Year
  • Local mum reconsiders catholic guilt as cost-of-living means ol mate Cap’n Birds Eye is coming for lunch
  • WA to Invoke Emergency Powers to Divert Froffs to Those Who Forgot to Stock Up Before Good Friday
  • NASA Reveals Artemis Program Aims to Establish New Perth Suburb on Moon

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