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The Bell Tower Times

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Monday, August 31, 2026
The Bell Tower Times
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Giant red bin erected in Secret Harbour to commemorate by-election win

    Secret Harbour is waking up to the dawn of a new age. Not only did they vote to leave the EU but they have now…

    Belle August 31, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Travel

    Jetstar outdoes South African plane’s dangerously close flyover stunt by getting dangerously close to not cancelling a flight

    Rugby fans were left amazed and in need of new grundies after two Airlink planes performed a dangerously close flyover of DHL Stadium in Cape…

    Belle August 31, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Secret Harbour set to leave the EU after One Nation victory

    The first order of business for British outpost Secret Harbour is to break the shackles of what they feel is a bad deal as a…

    Belle August 30, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Sports

    AFL scraps Wildcard Round effective immediately after Collingwood fail to make finals

    The AFL has announced that in hindsight it had wasted its and everyone else’s time with this wildcard malarkey after it failed to get Collingwood…

    Belle August 29, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Donald Trump hits hole-in-one on the 12th at The Cut in Dawesville

    Some say it’s nearly impossible to ace the 12th at The Cut against the howling Mandurah breeze but US President Donald Trump proved the haters…

    Belle August 28, 2026
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Featured Party & Entertainment

Mr Swan River Booze Cruise

Belle November 28, 2021 Party

Move over blue/green algae outbreaks, Brett is the grossest thing floating on top of the Swan River. Today, Brett’s celebrating his buck’s party and has…

View More Mr Swan River Booze Cruise
Bell Tower Times Featured Perth & WA Locations

Ms Cottesloe Beach

Belle November 27, 2021 beachGolden TriangleInstagram

It’s hot out, so Cass heads to Perth’s most iconic amateur modelling competition: Cottesloe Beach. En route, she stops off at the Boatshed to stock…

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Party & Entertainment Featured

Mr Dunsborough Toolie

Belle November 21, 2021 BoganDouth

Damo graduated in 2004 and had the time of his life on his Leavers break down in Dunsborough so to remind himself of when he…

View More Mr Dunsborough Toolie
BREAKING NEWS Featured

REPORT: Attempts At Post Lunch Beers Productivity Just A Macabre Charade

Belle November 19, 2021 office

Jeremy hasn’t done a fucken thing since about 11:45 this morning when he left his workstation to feast on a tray of leftover pastries in…

View More REPORT: Attempts At Post Lunch Beers Productivity Just A Macabre Charade
From the Zoo

IN FOCUS: The Company Golf Day

Belle November 16, 2021 officesports

When you combine a marketing budget with a vague corporate notion of “networking” you get the corporate golf day. Everyone’s favourite tax-deductible piss-up on the…

View More IN FOCUS: The Company Golf Day
Featured Sports, Auto & Hobbies

The Perth Fitness Cougar

Belle November 16, 2021 cougarGym

The unpleasant discharge from muscular Tinder sexpests has polluted gyms and threatened the natural habitat of the lifestyle-fitness birds. Glamorous Western Suburbs cougars were forced…

View More The Perth Fitness Cougar

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TRENDING NEWS

  • Giant red bin erected in Secret Harbour to commemorate by-election win
  • Jetstar outdoes South African plane’s dangerously close flyover stunt by getting dangerously close to not cancelling a flight
  • Secret Harbour set to leave the EU after One Nation victory
  • AFL scraps Wildcard Round effective immediately after Collingwood fail to make finals
  • Donald Trump hits hole-in-one on the 12th at The Cut in Dawesville
  • AFL Requires proof of 10 Years of Social Media Meltdowns to Buy Flagmantle finals tickets

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