RBA boss Phillip Lowe has delivered a message to every West Australian, advising them to stop whinging about inflation and get on the deccos to save on grocery bills.
According to the Governor, you can get a good deal on bulk d-bangers for around $4.50 if you buy a bottle at a time. Even $3 with the right plug. Adding,
“Inflation is an issue the RBA has been unable to solve and obviously food is heavily marked up at the moment. I’ve seen a packet of dogshit Woolies snags for $9 and the rest of the meal adding up to well into the high teens. Do you know what’s a lot cheaper? 2 demons right before dinner”
Lowe estimated that you’d be up to 100% less hungry to actual food and cut your grocery bill dramatically. In his words, this is what the people need to do if they want to enjoy the luxuries my generation had and farked up for everyone else.
We spoke to a millennial who had already moved back in with the folks in the hope of affording a house. They said the Governor’s advice has been very helpful,
“I think I’ve got scurvy. I’m on the dexie and frozen chicken ovenable diet. Weight is just dropping off too! I reckon I’m saving at least $50 a week and the only side effect is my health”
Naturally, the Gov’s advice has attracted its critics. With local dexie dealer and all round shitbag telling The Times,
“I was going to raise my rates due to inflation but now I have all these starving customers telling me that if I do that they’ll never leave the rent trap. I’m really stuck. I’m exactly the kind of cretin to charge $6 but it’s got me thinking”
The WA Government has been forced to send out a warning to all struggling millennials advising them to get sufficient nutrition and not skimp on grocery bills with legal speed.
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