Fugitive Michael Bublé On The Run In Perth After Escaping Christmas

Christmas crooner, Michael “The Bube” Bublé has managed to escape from his winter wonderland captivity. Specifics are thin at this stage but no doubt it’ll be a Rudolf’s red-nose alert in the North Pole with all hands on deck working to recapture the holiday sensation. 

Of course, the North Pole’s loss is Perth’s gain. With the fugitive seen taking in some of Perth’s most lacklustre sights. A witness who spotted Bublé at Elizabeth Quay told The Times,

“I guess compared to his frozen prison, Perth was pretty cool. Rather than a bunch of elves trying to candy cane him he just had to compete with some confused tourists trying to take photos on an iPad. He looked happy, good for him”

The news that Bublé has infiltrated Perth has sent the local mum community wild. With many hoping to catch a glimpse of the superstar and maybe snack on a little cookie they’ll leave out for daddy-clause. A mum told The Times,

“Bublé is the full package. A real gentleman. Why can’t I have some Bublé all year round? It’s an all you can Bublé buffet and I want seconds *smiles cougarishly*

At the time of posting this article, groups of rogue mothers were roaming the Perth CBD area looking for him. Only one question remains, who will find him first? Christmas or a toey mother?

Sources close to Bublé claim he’s in town to perform a live show. No doubt using a body double to avoid capture from a very irate Santa. A spokesperson for the Christmas Corporation told The Times,

“He’s our property. He’s the most valuable thing we own. Yeah, OWN. He sold his soul to Santa many years ago and the deal is simple. He gets all the Elf-poontang he wants and he melts hearts every year. Simple”

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