A Wesley lad who decided in year 9 that the trade life was the life for him has finally had a taste of it. While enjoying working with his hands he gets the distinct impression that every other tradie on site can smell his elite upbringing.
He would be right. We spoke to a tradie who worked along Bailey this week who told The Times,
“You could tell he is trying to roughen up those edges but the fancy boy shit shines through ay. Bloke wouldn’t know a 10-pack of Wild Turkey 101 if it was smacking him in the face. Which it was last Friday after he he said dance like a … ah I won’t go there, don’t want another HR issue ay”
Indeed, young Bailey has been spending his afternoons after work trying to undo all the sheen that a PSA education had left on him. He told The Times,
“I said a screw was being a bit tricky and this bloke wanted to punch me. He told me it was being a cunnovadog and if it didn’t toighten properly soon then cuntsfarked. It’s a bit of a different language to the mean streets of South Perth but I think getting it. Wait, South Poiiirth”
His attempts sadly are mostly in vain. With another tradesman on site saying that his postcode alone disqualified him from ever getting a smooth run under his watch. Adding,
“I call him Master Farkwit, ask him if his butler is going to go and clean up after him or if he’s gonna. Mate, you get all these private school boys cosplaying the life. We all know deep down they are clean shirts”
To accelerate the process, Bailey has attempted to grow facial hair that only garners him further ridicule. He’s left wondering how hard it is for a PSA educated bloke to get ahead in this world.
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Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?
